Self sabotage, how to cure it

Are you sabotaging your own results without realising?

24 February 2016

Self sabotage could be keeping you small.

Have you ever felt your going around in circles? Keep having the same fears repeatedly? Or maybes you get to your goal weight, lifestyle and all of a sudden it vanishes in front of your eyes before you can even say self sabotage. 

Even as you read this, there may be a little voice in your head, thats saying i'm crazy. Oh you know the voice that I'm talking about?  The voice that debates everything and chats away all day inside your head. If your lucky it's a positive voice telling you what a brilliant job your doing, and mentally giving you high fives every time you cross something off your list.

Unfortunately if your like myself and many other women and men, it's probably not a positive voice at all. Heres some of the things mine says to me on a regular basis?

  • Eugh your skin is terrible today.
  • Your hair's always such a mess I don't know why you bother.
  • Your such a fraud.
  • Don't bother writing about that, no-one cares what you have to say.

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And so forth. That's a 5 minute snippet of my internal voice, can you imagine speaking to yourself like that all day?

Most likely you probably are.

If your friend spoke to you like you speak to yourself, how long do you think you would put up with that? Not for long I hope, so why do we endure it ourselves?

Well because it's us, and quite frankly there's no escaping it. To be honest there is, but that's outside the realms of this article.

But what we can do is change what it's saying to us. How do you think you would feel if instead of the above your internal voice said the following things to you.

  • Babe, your looking amazing today!
  • You killed it with that article, high five!
  • Keep chasing those dreams, your so close!

Can you imagine how much happier, productive and worthy you would feel on a daily basis?

Its possible, but it's going to take some work. After all everything you want your going to need to get uncomfortable getting!

Firstly thing about times that you have overcame the fear. Despite being scared of the change what did you still go on to achieve?

I’m sure theres numerous events in your life where you have done. Take some time to recognise them and give yourself a huge pat on the back.

Now think about, what is it you desire? What would bring you joy on a daily basis?

Write them down.

Whats stopping you from going and getting them? Some of the main reasons for self sabotage are:

  • Fear. It can be fear of being successful or fear of failure, or fear of being seen, or even what others will think of you.
  • Risk. You may have to give something up to get there. Maybes you will need to get up earlier in the morning and give up 15 minutes in bed. Maybes you need to give up your income to pursue your dreams.
  • Not being loved. What if you put it out there, and no-one responds?
  • Discomfort. Fear of change.

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Now that you have recognised what is holding you back its time to create change. Be kind to yourself, and show yourself love. Knowledge is power. Now that you have started to recognise this, you may find that you become more and more aware of self sabotage patterns in your daily life.

As Seth Godin says - Fear is not the enemy. Paralysis is the enemy.

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